UMBRELLA   A good thing to put up in a shower--or pawn-shop; but, like skating, never seen after Lent.
UNBOSOMED
unbosomed A shirt just returned from a steam laundry.
UNION   An ailing individual frequently troubled by scabs and liable to strike without warning.
UMPIRE   No jeweler, but a high authority on diamonds.
USHER   One who takes a leading part in a theatre.
VACCINATION   Where "jabbing the needle" is never a vice.
VAUDEVILLE   From Lat. vaut, good for, and villageois, countryman. Good for countrymen.
VERANDA
veranda An open-air enclosure often used as a spoon-holder.
VEST   A waistcoat sold at halfprice.
VIRTUE   A quality oftentimes associated with intelligence, but rarely with beauty.
VULGARITY   The conduct of others.