Aaaugh! - a humor archive
Article 1251 of rec.humor.funny.reruns:
Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny.reruns
From: tmorris@scofflaw.convex.com (Terry Morris)
Subject: Family Stress Test
Keywords: original, chuckle, originally appeared in second quarter, 1993
Approved: rhf-reruns@netfunny.com
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Date: Sat, 3 Jul 1999 19:20:00 PDT
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Family Stress Test

As part of a seminar I recently attended on stress in the workplace, I was given a packet which included a family stress test. Our family found that all of the questions fell into what we considered the "wuss" category, and generated our own family stress test:

Score 0 if the statement is never true, 1 if it is rarely true, 2 if it is sometimes true, and 3 if it is always true.

  1. ____ Conversations often begin with "Put the gun down, and then we can talk".

  2. ____ The school principal has your number on speed-dial.

  3. ____ The cat is on Valium.

  4. ____ People have trouble understanding your kids, because they learned to speak through clenched teeth.

  5. ____ You are trying to get your four-year-old to switch to decaf.

  6. ____ The number of jobs held down by family members exceeds the number of people in the family.

  7. ____ No one has _time_ to wait for microwave TV dinners.

  8. ____ "Family meetings" are often mediated by law enforcement officials.

  9. ____ You have to check your kid's day-timer to see if he can take out the trash.

  10. ____ Maxwell House gives you industrial rates.

Scoring:

30 - a perfect score. Welcome to the neighborhood!
20-29 - You are doing reasonably well, but still have too little going on in your life. Crank it up.
10-19 - You have mastered some of the aspects of the stress-filled life, but still have a long way to go. Have you considered a parallel career path?
0-9 - Enjoying all that extra time? What do you _do_ anyway?


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