(James M. Smith, David L. Frison, Robert J. Nekervis II (AKA Emo Child) , and August E. Brunsman IV)

A List of Lists

1. 101 Carnivorous, starving animals that are fun to poke.
2. 101 Ways to have fun with baldness.
3. 101 Other things "No" could mean.
4. 101 Most well known secrets.
5. 101 Things that virtually kill my soul, leaving me precariously perched between false hope and abject despair.
6. 101 Reasons I like bunnies.
7. 101 Things that you damn well better be paranoid about.
8. 101 Ways to sever heads without being noticed.
9. 101 Ways to insult spoons.
10. 101 Intriguing and amusing biological failures.
11. 101 Most popular unnecessary surgical procedures.
12. 101 Things that make me feel like a little school girl.
13. 101 Things that make me feel like a BIG SCHOOL GIRL.
14. 101 Amusing, yet ineffective ways to make a fool out of yourself.
15. 101 Ways in which rednecks contribute to plate tectonics.
16. 101 Ways to get lynched at a spelling bee.
17. 101 Ways in which weasels can enrich your life.
18. 101 Ways to tell that you're tied to a treee.
19. 101 Different chicken organs to be used for...well, never mind...
20. 101 Ways to make friends and influence people through the magic of flatulence.
21. 101 Ways not to spell "tree."
22. 101 Most amusing ways people have been molested by aliens.
23. 101 Ways to do quantum mechanics on your fingers.
24. 101 Redundant things.
25. 101 Reasons to just give up.
26. 101 Cruel and unusual multiples of five.
27. 101 Really great ideas that suck when you say them aloud.
28. 101 Ways to get your ass kicked for profit and pleasure.
29. 101 Reasons to stop and burn the roses.
30. 101 Things I am anatomically opposed to.
31. 101 Things you're better off not piercing.
32. 101 Unnatural uses for bat guano.
33. 101 Improper methods of CPR.
34. 101 Bizarre reasons to say "I am wet now."
35. 101 Things that should be covered with vomit.
36. 101 Things in nature that resemble the EXACT opposite of what they, in fact, are.
37. 101 Unethical uses of the word fuzzy.
38. 101 Things that don't quite rhyme with the word "Bart."
39. 101 Sexy things about Tipper Gore.
40. 101 Unneeded limbs.
41. 101 Reasons why I'm glad the shuttle blew up.
42. 101 Reasons not to taunt someone who has a tank.
43. 101 Reasons why tying someone to the back bumper of your car and dragging them through five states is not a good way to make friends.
44. 101 Reasons to bathe.
45. 101 Reasons not to put a used condom over your head.
46. 101 Reasons why maxi pads need to fly.
47. 101 Farm animals you won't find while mining.
48. 101 Beverages that encroach on your personal space.
49. 101 Most fun and interesting items that have been removed from people's asses.
50. 101 Reasons why we need zinc.
51. 101 Artistic methods for home enemas.
52. 101 Uses for a dead mime.
53. 101 Unsavory places to put your penis.
54. 101 Tasty things you shouldn't put in your mouth.
55. 101 Cacti that are fun to sit on.
56. 101 Reasons to abridge freedom of speech.
57. 101 Silly reasons to pretend God exists.
58. 101 Reasons why "Family Circus" just sucks.
59. 101 Reasons to poke fun at starving children.
60. 101 Things you couldn't care less about.
61. 101 Things you're better off not sticking up your ass, in the first place.
62. 101 Ways to effectively use baby pacifiers as anal suppositories.
63. 101 Reasons to poke starving children.
64. 101 Reasons why trees shouldn't be following you home.
65. 101 Activities in which, no matter what you do, you will end up smelling like jellyfish.
66. 101 Ways to induce seizures in the elderly.
67. 101 Innocent people that should die.
68. 101 Things that you shouldn't try to balance on your head.
69. 101 Erotic forms of execution.
70. 101 Stupid ways to get pregnant.
71. 101 Colors that don't exist, but are in crayon boxes anyway.
72. 101 Reasons why.
73. 101 Reasons why not.
74. 101 Reasons why bike locks aren't made of gold.
75. 101 Cruel things you can do to orphans.
76. 101 Reasons why vultures fall apart.
77. 101 Things not to have sex with.
78. 101 Creatures not to glue together.
79. 101 Reasons not to drink rubber cement, even though you know you should.
80. 101 Reasons to put a cat in a jar.
81. 101 Reasons why I smell like smoke.
82. 101 Substitutes for gasoline that didn't quite work.
83. 101 Reasons why pain hurts.
84. 101 Ways to take it in the nuts.
85. 101 Reasons to set fire to the homeless.
86. 101 Nazis that weren't very nice.
87. 101 Reasons not to piss in a stranger's cup, even when he asks you nicely.
88. 101 Acts never to perform for a circus monkey.
89. 101 Reasons not to stare at the sun, even though you know you ought to.
90. 101 Reasons why the word "red" should not be used as a flavor.
91. 101 Ways to survive death.
92. 101 Reasons why Batman could kick Spider-man's ass.
93. 101 Things to consider before renting a calliope.
94. 101 Things not to do with a cheese grater.
95. 101 Most popular children's games involving venereal diseases.
96. 101 Things to do with barbed wire, an acetylene torch, and a bottle of lubricant.
97. 101 Reasons why Mountain Dew resembles urine.
98. 101 Reasons why sheep shouldn't be in solitary confinement.
99. 101 Ways to effectively pretend you're a worm without offending sexy Tipper Gore.
100. 101 Reasons why the publication of this list presents a clear and present danger to the national security of the United States of America.
101. 101 Reasons to publish a list of the top 101 things to make 101 item long lists about.